Orchard Theatre

Orchard Theatre
Home Gardens, Dartford, Kent, DA1 1ED

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Orchard Theatre

Opened in 1983 by the Duke of Kent, the Orchard Theatre has been attracting a range of genres and styles through its doors. Ranging from comedians, West End musicals, drama, opera and music, the theatre maintains the area's cultural leanings.

Handily situated in Dartford town centre, the theatre is just a few minutes from the train station, which services direct trains from London and Kent. Parking is available in two venues: the Civic Centre car park (just over the footbridge; free after 6pm) and the Orchard Shopping Centre car park (parking charge; closes at midnight).

Event times

There are 39 events at this location

Sorted by title / date & time

Al Murray: Let's Go Backwards Together

A brand new show from everyone's favourite bigoted landlord, Al Murray, star of Happy Hour. Please only cheer at the irony and stay in your house if you actually hate the French.

All or Nothing

A musical based on the 1960s group The Small Faces.

Mon 19 Jun

£22–£29 PREMIERE CARD £7.50 off Mon (off top two price tickets only) / 01322 220000

Tue 20 Jun

£22–£29 PREMIERE CARD £7.50 off Mon (off top two price tickets only) / 01322 220000

Wed 21 Jun

£22–£29 PREMIERE CARD £7.50 off Mon (off top two price tickets only) / 01322 220000

Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom

  • Directed by: Richard Lewis
  • Written by: Mani Svavarsson (music)

Richard Lewis' adaptation of the award-winning television animation set in a miniature world of fairies, elves and insects. The production features original music by Mani Svavarsson, with original lyrics by Matt Lewis.

The Bowie Experience

Tribute to the late, great David Bowie.

Wed 29 Nov

£25.50 / 01322 220000

La Cage Aux Folles

John Partridge stars as Albin and Adrian Zmed as Georges in this Bill Kenright production about drag artists and family values.

Tue 9 May

£17–£51.50 / 01322 220000

Wed 10 May

£17–£51.50 / 01322 220000

Thu 11 May

£17–£51.50 / 01322 220000

…and 2 more dates until 13 May

Champions Of Magic

Following a run in London's West End five illusionists present a live show of mind reading, close-up magic and daring large-scale illusions.

Tue 18 Apr

£23.50 / 01322 220000

Chris Dean's Syd Lawrence Orchestra

A night of swing, dance, and jazz from the ever popular Syd Lawrence Orchestra.

Sun 5 Mar

Chris Ramsey: Is That Chris Ramsey?

Upbeat anecdotes, feelgood humour and witty observations from Ramsey.

Sat 4 Mar

The Crucible

  • Directed by: Douglas Rintoul
  • Written by: Arthur Miller

Arthur Miller's The Crucible, presented by Sell a Door Theatre Company and the Queens Theatre Hornchurch.

Tue 14 Mar

Prices to be confirmed / 01322 220000

Wed 15 Mar

Prices to be confirmed / 01322 220000

Thu 16 Mar

Prices to be confirmed / 01322 220000

…and 2 more dates until 18 Mar

Dreamboats and Petticoats

  • Directed by: Bob Tomson
  • Written by: Maurice Gran

Jukebox musical based on the songs of Roy Orbison, the Shadows, Eddie Cochran, Billy Fury and others.

Mon 6 Mar

£20–£34.50 / 01322 220000

Tue 7 Mar

£20–£34.50 / 01322 220000

Wed 8 Mar

…and 3 more dates until 11 Mar

The ELO Experience

This tribute band recreates 'Mr Blue Sky' et al, probably with a more stable line-up than the real ELO.

Wed 29 Mar

£25.50 / 01322 220000

Fantastic Mr Fox

A playful retelling of Roald Dahl's sly tale.

Tue 28 Feb

£22.50 / 01322 220000

Wed 1 Mar

Thu 2 Mar

…and 3 more dates until 5 Mar


  • Directed by: Arlene Phillips (choreographer)
  • Written by: Jim Jacobs

The classic romantic musical, set in an American high school in the '50s.

Tue 21 Nov

£20–£45 / 01322 220000

Wed 22 Nov

£20–£45 / 01322 220000

Thu 23 Nov

£20–£45 / 01322 220000

…and 2 more dates until 25 Nov

The Johnny Cash Roadshow

Cash tribute from singer-songwriter Clive John.

Mon 27 Feb

£20.50–£24.50 / 01322 220000

Jon Richardson: Old Man

Wry observations and pessimistic humour from the 8 out of 10 Cats star, who is starting to feel his age.

Fri 20 Oct

Jools Holland and His Rhythm & Blues Orchestra

Jools and his band play classic boogie woogie and rock'n'roll tunes for your merriment. Featuring guest vocalists Ruby Turner and Louise Marshall.

Thu 4 May

Lee Hurst: Comedy Show No 9

Stand-up comedy show from the veteran Londoner.

Thu 20 Apr

Lee Nelson: Suited and Booted

Lee Nelson, the creation of comedian Simon Brodkin, is the chavvy catch-phrase monger whose Well Good Show has become a BBC3 hit. Now the South London geeza takes his banter to the live stage where it all works best. Brodkin has appeared as Nelson in a host of TV programmes including Al Murray's sketch show Al Murray's…

Sun 19 Mar


Pop icon, Bond singer and 1969 winner of the Eurovision Song Contest whose singing career spans six decades.

Tue 24 Oct

£39 / 01322 220000

Motown's Greatest Hits: How Sweet It Is

Celebrating over 50 years of Motown music with tributes to The Four Tops and The Temptations, Stevie Wonder, the Jackson 5 and many more.

Thu 30 Mar

£25–£28 / 01322 220000

Mr Bloom's Nursery LIVE

CBeebies Ben Faulks will be joined by all his gardening friends including Margaret, Joan, Colin, Raymond and Sebastian, the lovable Wee MacGregors, and The Compostarium for an interactive stage show with familiar songs and strong educational values.

Naomi's Wild And Scary

The children's TV presenter recalls some of her most exciting wildlife experiences from the far flung corners of the world and introduces the audience to some of the most fierce and frightening animals she met along the way, joined on stage by Animal Mark.

Sun 9 Apr

£23.50 (Children £19.50 under 16s) / 01322 220000

Noel & Gertie

Sheridan Morley's warm and witty musical comedy based on the legendary friendship and professional collaboration of the actor, playwright and songwriter and the alluring and charismatic actress.

Tue 28 Mar

£21–£26 / 01322 220000

Omid Djalili: Schmuck for a Night

The British-Iranian comedian and star of stage and screen brings his new show to an adoring public.

Sat 6 May

Out of Order

Ray Cooney's 1990 farce set in a posh London hotel.

Mon 5 Jun

£22.50–£39.50 / 01322 220000

Tue 6 Jun

£22.50–£39.50 / 01322 220000

Wed 7 Jun

£22.50–£39.50 / 01322 220000

…and 3 more dates until 10 Jun

Pasha: Let's Dance The Night Away

The Strictly Come Dancing star and his fantastic dancers are back again touring the UK with their completely brand new show. Expect favourite dances, stunning costumes, great music, chat and fun for all the family.

Sat 22 Apr

Reginald D Hunter: The Man Who Attempted To Do As Much and Such

The self-proclaimed 'comedian, swashbuckler and scientist' takes his latest and no doubt controversial show on the road.

Rumours of Fleetwood Mac

The Mick Fleetwood-approved tribute act who cover the gamut of Mac material from the Peter Green era to the Buckingham/Nicks days.

Sun 26 Feb

£24.50–£34.50 / 01322 220000

Russell Brand: Re:Birth

The controversial stand-up embarks on his latest tour, inspired by the birth of daughter.

Sun 9 Apr

£29 / 01322 220000

Sally Morgan

Got a goldfish that you flushed down the toilet that you need to say sorry to? Now's your chance to apologise through the medium of Sally Morgan.

Wed 3 May

£28.50–£32.50 / 01322 220000

Sam Bailey

The former prisoner officer turned songstress who won the 2013 X Factor takes her debut album The Power Of Love on the road.

Fri 31 Mar

£28–£33 / 01322 220000

Sat 1 Apr

£28–£33 / 01322 220000

Shakin' Stevens

The eighties' singer with the famous hips performs his past hits to celebrate the anniversary of 30 years since the release of his first hit in the UK. In 1980 the singer released Hot Dog after years of touring and recording Stevens got his big break. His success in the eighties continued with the release of Marie Marie…

Wed 19 Apr

£22.50–£35 / 01322 220000

The Simon & Garfunkel Story

With a backdrop of projected photos and original film footage a full live band perform Simon & Garfunkel hits including 'Mrs Robinson', 'Cecilia', 'Homeward Bound' and many more.

Tue 2 May

£20.50–£22 / 01322 220000

The Sons Of Pitches

Inventive pop covers, original numbers and improvised songs from the multi award-winning a cappella YouTube stars and winners of BBC Two's The Naked Choir..

Wed 28 Jun

Times to be confirmed / Phone for prices / 01322 220000

The Sooty Show

Sweep, Soo and Richard join the loveable bear to celebrate his birthday party – where things don't seem to be going to plan.

Sun 16 Apr

£15 (£13) / 01322 220000

Tango Fire: Flames Of Desire

  • Written by: german Cornejo

Argentinian dance company led by choreographer and dancer German Cornejo.

Sat 25 Feb

£20–£28.50 / 01322 220000

That'll Be the Day

Step back in time with a brand new edition of the popular touring show, and hear rock'n'roll hits from the 50s, 60s and 70s.

Sun 12 Mar

£29.50 / 01322 220000

The Wedding Singer

The cast from The Wedding Singer the Musical (based on the smash hit Adam Sandler movie) perform hits from the show alongside West End hits and 80s classics.

Tue 21 Mar

£22.50–£40.50 / 01322 220000

Wed 22 Mar

£22.50–£40.50 / 01322 220000

Thu 23 Mar

£22.50–£40.50 / 01322 220000

…and 2 more dates until 25 Mar

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