Singles & Downloads

Hopes that Lil’ Chris’ ‘Checkin’ It Out’ (Sony/BMG) (*) was the new Chris Rock CD couldn’t have been further from the truth. Turns out this Chris is some pre-teen scrote from a Gene Simmons TV show and I only know that much from seeing the little runt - What? I said runt - on Popworld this morning. I didn’t much like him then and I like him even less after hearing this anodyne, sub-Busted, pop-rock tripe.

At the other end of the spectrum is The Bucky Rage’s ‘Vote for Jesus’ EP (Northern Cowboy) (**). It’s rough and raw Glasgow rock attitude but in its own way just as predictable.

Still at least Badly Drawn Boy’s ‘Nothing’s Going to Change Your Mind’ (EMI) (***) will cheer you up. Well, maybe not. It’s a plodding piano ballad, which is, you know, fine but at the same time pretty forgettable. It’s almost indistinguishable from The All-American Rejects ‘It Ends Tonight’ (Interscope) (***). Except the latter has some big-ass guitars towards the end in the way that Yank bands do. Meanwhile, Lionel Richie returns with ‘I Call It Love’ (***). I call it bland, pseudo-romantic, sentimental shite. But hey, what do I know? Lionel’s been milking this shit for years now and he’ll be damned if he stops now.

Up next is the Duke Special’s Last Night I Nearly Died (V2) (***) which is more Badly Drawn Boy than the man himself, while Longcut’s ‘A Tried & Tested Method’ (***) is a wistful mix of guitars and laid back beats. Prize of mindful eclecticism of the Fortnight must go to I Fly Spitfire Records ‘The Spitfires Split’ (I Fly Spitfires Records) (****) which features four excellent acts, with everything from the brooding Mercury Rev-isms of Copy Haho to the acerbic indie magic of The Rushes.

Imogen Heap’s ‘Headlock’ (Pomona) lllll provides a welcome break from all the guitars with her laid back synth-pop but it’s nothing that sticks in the mind. Which means that, due to a particularly uninspiring batch of songs, Single of the Fortnight goes to The Killers’ ‘When You Were Young’ (****). Oh, how some club-friendly, Timbaland produced sex-beats could have improved matters. I never thought I’d say this but where are JT and Nelly Furtado when you need them? Take it to the chorus!

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